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Archive for Rantz

NEWZ! « This is NOT Amerika®

German Chancellor Angela Merkel and THE REST OF THE WORLD attempt to reason with the spoon-fed U.S. schoolboy. EMBARRASSING!

After 10 years at this, we’re bringing back an oldie but goodie. Starting in October 2018, we will crack open the audio vault and re-release highlights and Newlights of our award-winning series on fucked-up America.

We tried to stay away, but this trump fucker just keeps getting stupider and stupider! In short, there is just TOO MUCH FREE comedy GOLD to resist. This MORON keeps handing out beauties that just beg to be fondled…

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Overweight, flaccid married man on the prowl…

Yep, my husband, for the third time, is prowling the intertubes looking for some half-blind, brain dead female to tell him he’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. He needs to hear this every day – especially when he’s sitting in his recliner for the 16th consecutive hour watching the Sci-Fi channel with the remote in one hand and a bag of Chips Read the rest of this entry »

RANT! Goddamnit…

djmoose-avatar.jpgOkay…I feel the need to rant about something that’s been pissing me off. And those of you who know me best realize that I have not pet peeves, but major psychotic fuckin hatreds (Thanks to George Carlin for that quote.)

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Things I DON’T Need for Christmas!

santa-pc.gifDisclaimer: Before anyone thinks, “Fine you asshole!” I hope you get nothing for Christmas!” please realize that I don’t want or need anything for Christmas. In fact, that is the whole point here. I’m 26 and have a nice career. If I need something, I don’t ask Santa for it. I fucking buy it like an adult. What do I want for Christmas? I don’t know….sleep I guess. What I can tell you is this: Here are some things that I don’t want this holiday season:
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