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BOOKSHELF | Redefining Seduction

Book Front Cover

The new book on creating partnership, told through their own love story

Women want romance, men want sex.

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Of course, there are countless other needs and goals layered on top of these, and this book will help you put most of them in perspective, especially where loving partnership is concerned.

The male-powered movie and advertising industries survive on the titillation of these basic drives by offering myths and products that purport to illustrate and satisfy them.

That in turn perpetuates the need for those myths and products. The misinformation only complicates relations and causes misunderstandings between the sexes.

A quick review of my own life revealed a history of uneven experiences with men – based on my biological fascination with their bodies, my fear of the unknown, my low self-esteem, unrealistic expectations (like being swept off my feet by my Knight in Shining Armor), and going along with the popular convention of sarcasm in conversation with men. These were cultural norms, and I hold accountable the culture I inhabit for my living alone for years and for damaging the men around me.

And, as you know, it’s still happening in every generation.

Most men do not want to be ‘Knights in Shining Armor’. They want to display how suitable they are for mating, without appearing to be displaying. They want to feel safe and loved in the arms of an understanding partner. They want kindness.

Evolutionary behaviorists Donna Sheehan and Paul Reffell

Women also want kindness from their mates, and they expect the nice, kind men to approach them, pursue them, to be the ready-made, perfect lover, husband, and father to their children.

It’s a recipe for disappointment.

Statistics show high divorce rates, women resentful of men, and 40% of American children being raised by single parents.

Luckily for me, my intuitive seduction of Paul was the genesis of our partnership research and thus our discovery of Darwin’s theory of Sexual Selection.

On Darwin’s 200th birthday this year, we proudly announced what the rest of the animal kingdom has been showing us forever – women are responsible for their own romance and choice of partnership.

Once we began to understand the roots of human behavior in evolutionary terms, we applied it to the genesis of war. The first spark of Redefining Seduction was ignited by the global (mostly-male) media when they wrote about and published photographs of thousands of (mostly) women in naked protests inspired by our pro-peace organization:

“These men treated us with respect, a reaction to our vulnerability, lying nude and helpless on the earth.”

That vulnerability was powerful and, yes, seductive! Thus, the gentle art of Seduction thus became a political word for us.

This science-based book will clear up most of your misunderstandings of the opposite sex. If taken to heart, it will lead to women learning to take responsibility for romance, women no longer waiting, lonely, for The Call, and the ability of women using their biological feminine power in partnership with all those lonely men. Once women show men what they really want, we just might save our species and planet from men’s displays of prowess.

Send your comments, questions, review and interview requests to Donna & Paul at

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